Looking Up From The Bench

I apologize for the lack of cool pictures in this post. I really need to make more of an effort to get over my insecurities and take more, at least for the blog! Anyway, today’s post is a lot of me trying to make sense of my feelings. While training about three weeks ago I felt a pop in my shoulder. I didn’t think much of it at the time but the days following I was in significant pain. After getting an MRI it has been confirmed I have a torn muscle in my rotator cuff, and need surgery. With this injury, there is a 6-12 month total recovery, similar to what I went through with my ACL in 2015. Not to dramatize this, but the only word that accurately describes how I feel is “devastated.” There are a few reasons why. First: This is my fifth significant injury in five years. A huge goal for my coach and I this year was to not get injured. And really, I don’t think we could have expected it. The weight I was using when I felt the pop was 160 pounds. I have lifted 50 pounds+ more th...

This week at the gym I was hanging out with some people from my class. Someone complimented my nails. Side note, about a year ago I got my nails done for a wedding, and just loved it and the way it made me feel! Since then I’ve been kind of hooked, and just really enjoy getting to pick new colors and designs every few weeks. Anyway, I responded to them by saying, “thanks, it’s the only feminine thing I do.” And my friend Rachel said “weightlifting is feminine.” And that got me thinking about something. So much of how we view ourselves and the world is based on societal constructs regarding what is considered good, appropriate, valid, etc. If I lived in a culture where females dominated strength sports, would I still feel that my passion and hobbies aren’t “feminine.” Would I still feel the need to explain how getting my nails done makes me feel more “girly," as if qualifying the fact that I love all things related to the gym and generally don’t feel I have the same style as a...

I’ve been wanting to write for a couple weeks now. However, in the midst of so much unexplainable tragedy happening in our society, it was just hard to even know what to say; or make sense of things. The only thing I know for sure is that we can all use to be more compassionate, loving, and understanding of one another. And just remember to see the good that is happening around us. I wanted to share a large piece of good that has been occurring for me recently in training. About three weeks ago a workout was programmed that I was irrationally scared of. Why I felt SUCH insecurity about this particular piece still doesn’t make much sense. I had a complete meltdown. And it was an experience where I could see and feel that I wasn’t being rational, and yet that didn’t help me feel like I had any more control over my flood of emotions. However, this meltdown ended with me bouncing back quite well. A couple days later, I came in and a workout was programmed with heavy snatching. T...